Thursday, October 07, 2004

Enough is Enough

Thus says… the Lord and your God, who pleads the cause of His people: "See, I have taken out of your hand the cup of trembling…You shall no longer drink it.
But I will put it into the hand of those who afflict you, Who have said to you, 'Lie down, that we may walk over you.' And you have laid your body like the ground, And as the street, for those who walk over."

~ Psalms 51:22,23 (NKJV)

Some day, when she's old enough,
She's gonna start askin' questions about him.
Some kid at school brings his Dad for show and tell,
And gets her little mind a-wonderin'
"Where's my Daddy? Do I have one?
Does he not love me like you do?"
Oh, maybe I'll find someone to love the both of us,
And I'll tell her when she's old enough to know the truth.
Will it break her heart?
Will she understand
that I had to leave?
That's what was best for me and Emily.
The house was never clean enough;
his dinner never warm enough.
Nothing I did was ever good enough
to make him happy.
So I guess he gave me
what he thought I deserved,
But it would kill me
if he ever raised his hand to her.
It's a brand new day,
It's a second chance.
Yesterday is just a memory,
For me and Emily.
Me and Emily ~ recorded by Rachel Proctor

Last week, the Wabaunsee County Commissioners, Ervan Stuewe, Maurice Gleason and Fred Howard, signed the following official Proclamation declaring October, 2004 Domestic Violence Awareness Month.

WHEREAS, the problems and effects of domestic violence span all economic, racial, and social segments of our society; and
WHEREAS, the impact of domestic violence is extensive and acutely affects women and their children and society as a whole; and
WHEREAS, the crime of domestic violence violates an individual’s privacy, dignity, security, and humanity through the use of physical, emotional, sexual, psychological and economic control and/or abuse; and
WHEREAS, men and women must recognize the full scope of this social problem and work together to create a community that refuses to tolerate domestic violence; and
WHEREAS, it has been battered women themselves working in the forefront to bring peace and equality into the home; and
WHEREAS, nearly 50 incidents of domestic violence in Wabaunsee County are reported to law enforcement each year; and
WHEREAS, the YWCA Battered Women Task Force/Sexual Assault Counseling Programs provides immediate crisis intervention, short-term shelter, support groups, individual therapeutic counseling for victims and abusers, community advocacy, community referrals, and outreach and preventive education.

NOW, THEREFORE, WE, THE COMMISSIONERS OF WABAUNSEE COUNTY, do hereby proclaim October, 2004 as

Domestic Violence Awareness Month


and urge all residents to support the work of collaborative agencies in serving the needs of families impacted by domestic violence and work toward the elimination of domestic violence in our community.

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Here are some staggering statistics:

Ø In the United States, a woman is beaten by her husband or boyfriend every 15 seconds.
Ø 2-4 million women a year are assaulted by their partners.
Ø 80% of battering incidents start in the home
Ø At least 25 % of domestic violence victims are pregnant when beaten.
Ø Child abuse is 15 times more likely to occur in families where domestic violence is present.
Ø Every day, four women are beaten to death.

If you or someone you know needs help, please call the 24-hour Kansas Crisis Hotline
at 1-888- END ABUSE or the Kansas Coalition Against Sexual and Domestic Violence at (785) 232-9784.

In recognition of Domestic Violence Awareness Month, and in honor of all the women who have suffered physical, emotional or mental abuse at the hands of another, I would like to share the following poems and verses.

Enough is Enough
By Eileen Umbehr

When do you say, "Enough is enough?"
When do you point to the door?
When do you say, "Never again,
I'm not taking your abuse any more?"

Now it seems you've quit listening to the truth
and started believing his lies;
You turned from the light and shut the door,
because the light was hurting your eyes.

He used to say you were nothing,
now he says he's nothing without you;
He brings you flowers and candy,
and promises to be true.

He's playing with your emotions,
telling you he can't live without you;
Where has he been for the past twenty years?
Did this change just come out of the blue?

I grieve for you because I know,
he's still not being truthful;
He's just telling you what you want to hear,
and that's what makes it even more hurtful.

You say that you're not backing down,
you're just stepping back;
You want to give him one more chance,
to show you the love he has lacked.

Well, I have to respect your decision,
after all, this is your life, not mine;
I just don't want to see you get hurt again,
and I don't believe he'll toe the line.

But for your sake, I hope that I'm wrong,
and that you’ll both live happily ever after;
And I pray that your home will be filled once again,
with love, and peace and laughter.
Written for my sister, Mary
July 21, 2001

“But if the husband or wife who isn’t a Christian is eager to leave, it is permitted. In such cases the Christian husband or wife should not insist that the other stay, for God wants His children to live in peace and harmony. For, after all, there is no assurance to you wives that your husbands will be converted if they stay; and the same may be said to your husbands concerning your wives.”
~ I Corinthians 7:15 (Living Bible)

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On his own
By Eileen Umbehr

He tells her he never wanted this
And I guess in a way that is true
But it’s not what you think, let me explain
Maybe then you’ll see why he’s so blue.

He never wanted to cook his own meals
never wanted to mess with the bills
And he certainly never wanted to do his own wash
Or buy groceries to put on the shelves

He never wanted to sit all alone
in a one room apartment so plain
But when he had his wife and children around
All he ever did was complain

“Clean this! Clean that! Look at this place!
What have you been doing all day?
Just look at the dust on those baseboards – my God!
I just can’t keep living this way!”

Well, guess what? He doesn’t have to, now he lives on his own
with no noise, no confusion, no “filth”
So now if there’s something that hasn’t been done
He has no one to blame but himself

I guess he had to learn the hard way
You can’t have your cake and eat it, too
If you really want someone to be a part of your life
Then you better be faithful and true

Yes, you better show them you love them
By being helpful, respectful and kind,
Or one day they may be gone from your life
And you may be left behind

March 11, 2003

“See, this is the man who made not God his strength – his stronghold and high tower; but trusted and confidently relied on the abundance of his riches, seeking refuge and security for himself through his wickedness.”
~ Psalm 52:7

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Crossroads
By Kayleen Drebes

She cries in the night
and no one hears
her tears fall silent
just like her fears

She wants to leave
but she’s afraid to go
and her little ones
don’t even know

She hopes for the day
that things will change
she’ll try a little harder
perhaps – she’ll pray –

But it’s hard
to just – begin again –
when hurts lie deep
and love just ends

She feels like a broken
china doll
with no way to protect
the little ones from the fall

Her smile is weary
confusion surrounds her
she’s losing the will
to live – altogether

Her tells her – he loves her
and can’t live without her
She’s the one to blame
for the pain that he’s in

She’s ridden with guilt
for she’s the protector –
of all those hearts
in her care

And he is the conqueror
the master of the game
the one who decides
what is fair

The battle goes on
and she tried to persuade –
and ease the tension
reassure her own faith

But hope of the hopeless
grows weak and tired
the battle gets brutal
the scars no longer hide

Sooner or later
she must find her way
to the crossroad of truth
before it’s too late.

“And I will betroth you to Me forever; yes, I will betroth you to Me in righteousness and justice, and in steadfast love, and in mercies. I will even betroth you to Me in stability and in faithfulness, and you shall know – recognize, be acquainted with, appreciate, give heed to and cherish – the Lord.

And I will sow her for Myself anew in the land, and I will have pity, mercy and love for her who had not obtained pity, mercy and love, and I will say to those who were not My people, You are My people, and they shall say, You are my God!”
~ Hosea 2:19, 20, 23(Amplified)